By Voice of Lara
My previous post on this title was one of my best ever-the varied feedback that got me thrilled, flexible, refreshing and most importantly got me informed in all made it so. Many thanks to loads of debatable opinions that enriched the experience that birthed this reverse, that was after my eyes got opened to an altered dimension to the subject using a different views lens. The only constant thing in life is change - a confirmation.
I had always thought of monogamy as being African ancestry until different million views fell on me. The opinion of others was nothing compared to this experience I am about to share and if you as naive as I was, you could thank me later for this piece. I recently came across an American reality television series titled 'sister wives' which took me by storm.
Theirs was a polygamous family, and honestly this is no joke if you must know. This is an abridgment to the sequential clips that I was opportune to watch. The show documented the life of polygamist Kody Brown, (husband) married to 4 beautiful women (Meri, Janelle, Christine and Robyn), with 18 children. Kody and his wives confessed to clip in the show to make the public more aware of plural families and to combat societal narrow-mindedness.
Kodi considered this polygamist arrangement as legal being legally married only to one woman (Meri, the first wife), and labeled the other marriages as spiritual unions. Their union was so real, I can't even put it into words. I wished I could find myself in their world to demand to know much more that they had on display but in what seemed like they could read my mind, I got some questioned answered along the way.
Surprisingly, they all shared Kody's last name (Brown) as this closely knitted family played together, laughed together, went to the movies together and more astonishingly confessed that theirs was a story about love. Jealously, insecurity and selfishness were issues that they had to get over as they believed that no hell storm could rock their boat in their accord. Even though they thought they were subject to bigotry in public (the reason they were careful to let anyone into their space), they also resented people who were anti-polygamy.
Now, taking it down a notch, here is where I ask that my ignorance about Africans being the negative custodian of plural marriage be unreservedly pardoned. On the flip side, polygamy might not actually be a bad idea, infidelity is. I have learnt that polygamy is not adultery as long as all the parties involved do so with no element of secrecy and that infidelity on the other hand is simply not polygamy. My findings also contain that the act of taking a second wife or keeping alliances with other female partners does not necessarily mean that the relationship is for want of love - love other factors could be involved.
Above all, one man one wife existence is not African, it was one of those imported traditions that have robbed our African ancestry of the unlimited joy that such preceding could bring. What brought out the unique irony to the debate was the opposing stance of the two most popular imported religions in Africa. One is strictly in support of monogamy and frowns at anything that is short of it while the other is not only liberal on the issue but encourages polygamy to the letter. But my disagreement is with certain unfair judgement that came from individuals who would justify their actions with some self-centered theoretical perusal. If polygamy is encouraged only for the abbreviated reason of husband's loneliness when the wife traveled to care for grandchildren, then I see no reason why polyandry shouldn't be encouraged too. What is good for the goose should be good for the gander. Just saying... Continue reading here.
You can share your opinion. Which side of the coin would chose, and what would be your reason?
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